Recommendations

Books

I’m a big reader. i believe that books are great for learning about yourself, about how things work. they are also great for connecting. memoirs and the stories of others can help us get through the hard times. here are some of my personal recommendations, books that I keep close by, that I come back to again and again in my life like a good friend or a wise teacher.

psychoeducational

An excellent read about the psychosocial, systemic, and environmental causes of depression. (Spoiler: it’s not always you, there are some givens about the world we live in that predispose people towards depression.)

Drawing on current research and also the authors’ very personal stories of trauma, this book is a favourite of mine for anyone just starting out in therapy and trying to understand why we do what we do and what is on the other side of dysfunction. (Great read for struggling couples!)

Funny, personable, easy to read one that busts some of the more persistent myths and beliefs about stress, what causes it, and what actually works to relieve it. A favourite of mine for any of us who are chronic Caretakers, Do-ers, and Performers in the world who struggle with stress.

Also by the same authors as “Burnout”, a wonderful book about intimacy and sex.

memoirs

I can’t say enough about this one. A beautiful memoir of survival and the complexity of trauma. Touches on themes of vulnerability/unreliability of memory, destiny, and the power of re-claiming our stories.

This one touches on experiences of childhood abuse, broken child-parent relationships. I remember feeling at home in it somehow, the way that Ford takes us through painful experiences and their impacts and yet, you feel held and safe with her throughout.

About illness, life transitions, and awakenings. What happens when the rug is pulled from under us? When the world we thought was true, that we devoted ourselves to, comes crumbling. Excellent read.

This is a popular one and I thought I’d add it because it also speaks to life transitions, when our belief systems change. Personable and vulnerable read.

poetry + spirituality + stories

Amazing book that really touched my heart. Beautiful and poetic. A message of hope for those of us who know what it feels like to be estranged, outcast, left behind, and rejected.

Love love love this.

Love love love love love love this. This little book is like a hug on a sad day.

Videos

Here are some videos that I really like, from people whose work influences me as a therapist. (I love anything on developmental theory because what applies to kids’ emotional development also applies to adults, but not the other way around. This is even an idea in trauma that we have certain development tasks we need to meet in order to fully mature and if we grow up in an environment that does not give us the conditions we need to fulfil these tasks, we get stuck emotionally at that age. In therapy, we kind of “go back” to that point, that age, which might be a really young version of us, and try to give that part what it needed.)

This one is geared towards kids and their caregivers but actually a lot about anxiety here applies to adults too! Neufeld is a great lecturer and I feel like one of those people I can listen to without getting bored or falling asleep. He makes complicated, science-y subjects very easy to understand.
Why do we do what we do? Why do we get stuck doing the same damn thing, reacting the same way, when it doesn’t lead anywhere? Great video, an illuminating and compassionate look at ourselves, our desire for connection but also the fears that get in the way of it.